Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Cherry Blossom Samurai


A leisurely stroll among the delightful cherry blossoms in full bloom is a delight that should be on the must see list here on SOL 3 for any visitors from the Multiverse. I recommend visiting Japan in the 1860’s as I did.* I myself yes even I was then strolling through a magnificent panorama of pinkishness a color similar to that popular among the Cerulean Tussah Merchants veils** 16 Seasons ago (can you imagine?). I smile as I reminisce upon my first CTM veil so very perfect for flirting and gossiping!

I was luxuriating in the experience among these wondrous trees of pink when I heard in whispered masculine Japanese “I cannot see the blossoms as your beauty blinds the eyes.” Now certainly I have heard words similar to these on innumerable occasions but it still received my attention. I turned to see past the magically showering blossoms to behold what at first appeared to be an exotic drink attendant from the Enchantra Water Music Festival Celebratory Gala! Imagine my excitement at contemplating that perhaps one of those pursuing me may have ventured to follow me to this location in the hinterlands of the Multiverse.

However it was then that I realized that this was actually a local denizen in his own time period! He was what is referred to as a samurai, it was at this moment that I was thankful for recently applying Tantaliza Lustre Lip-paint.***

As the samurai walked towards me crushing the wonderfully delicate pink petals beneath his Bushidō stride I thought how charming he was in his armor holding his cute sword in his hand. He seemed ever so delicate among the sensual trees, quite intoxicating really! I almost used the stereotypical question “what are you a Cerulean Tussah merchant?” as the moment was so packed with drama, dreamy!

Soon after he complimented me upon my lustrous lips we began a delightful conversation about blossoms, gardens, tea and other such agreeable matters. We were both enchanted by the cherry blossom tree and its palace of petals, he preferred rather simple symbolic or even mystical gardens and although I admit that such a garden may have its charms I do prefer something with drama and scale such as JaQiNa 5 with its rather natural virgin garden on a global scale with lots of water, we were agreeable about tea although it seems that their tea ceremony is a rather quiet affair without a pool party or conversations concerning the Procreative Wars, Thought Wars, or Prime Pellucid Axiom’s!

I thought it imperative that I should then enlighten my samurai pink petal boy (well they were covering each of us like some sort of veil or such!) He seemed to like poetry but of course was unaware of the Multiverse so I shared some thoughts including Prime Pellucid Axiom #42 “The beauty of the eyes need travel no further than the beauty of the lips”. Well needless to say he then increased the romantic allusions with what he called a tanka:

Silver, or gold, or jewels?
How could they ever
Equal the greater treasure
That is a child? They can not.

Well it was all fine until he brought children into his intentions after all we had just met and I am no shroud-kiss (can you imagine?)! I was then suspicious that he was a proponent of the Procreative Wars but after further conversation it was clear he had mentioned such a thing as he thought I would find it desirable.

I have found this curious on SOL 3 and in need of some investigation. Some females of the dominant mammalian (land) species deliberately force themselves to wait in procreation past their healthy child birthing years then attempt a trapeze act of intervention methods to manufacture pregnancy. Some other females seem to jump at the opportunity to become an incubator.

There is even a current story being carried over the cute local SOL 3 news sources about a woman mysteriously named
Octo-Mom at first I presumed she was a supporter of Echelon Gender Continuity Theory. She has no masculine partner with six children and then went through medical treatment and delivered eight more children. Just so we are clear said female is of the superior land mammalian species (humans) and is not a K-9 (I should interject here that K-9’s love Tantaliza Lustre Lip-paint so you should have many opportunities to pet puppies if you wear it on SOL 3!)

Octo-Mom is apparently being offered a local currency of $1 million to “star” in what they call a “porno movie” (keep in mind that SOL 3 lacks Pleasure Threads). Many are now attempting to guess what a film of this nature would be named in these kinds of circumstances. Yes I understand that to those of us in the more advanced and sophisticated parts of the Multiverse find the concept of a pornographic film to be simply revoltingly boring but SOL 3 is a primitive cultural and ethical backwater.

However darlings I digress, I told my samurai suitor to concentrate more upon the jewels and not the children for now (imagine if I explained to him about Pleasure Threads!).

It was at that moment that several other samurai’s encircled us and began to attack us so I relieved my cherry blossom samurai of his sword and performed an improvised form of the Teuto-Trans-Zenith Dalliance Dance and thus disposed of the threat with red blood dripping from the blade upon the pink pathway.

I cleaned the blood off the blade before returning it to him (he seemed rather mystified which was endearing) then I took a “photograph” of my samurai, gave him a lingering kiss under the lovely cherry blossoms and then requested a Hyper-time-delineation transfer to the present from Pleasura Travel and that was when my adventures went awry! In upcoming articles I will expand upon my adventures with our dear sponsors through time and space over the past several months.

*SOL 3 NEWS and Award Winning Eye Candy Exclusively Time and Dimension Travel with PLEASURA TRAVEL!

** Award Winning Eye Candy exclusively wears veils by CERULEAN TUSSAH MERCHANTS

***Award Winning Eye Candy Exclusively Wears TANTALIZA LUSTRE LIP-PAINT (the lip-paint bar that makes you feel like you are at the bar no matter where you are!

Be sure to wander the Decoding the Multiverse for Earthlings section on the right sidebar if you are unfamiliar with a term or just ask for help!